You know that emoji with the person doing the face palm? That's me personified right now. I promised myself I wouldn't write a book, and well, that's exactly what I did. Grab a cup of coffee, or maybe have a couple of meals prepared, this could take you well into lunch. 

A note about race recaps: I've always felt that they are hard to read. It's like watching your favorite Netflix series from episode one after they have just released the whole season. I am cool with watching one or two episodes to get a feel for what's going on, and then I kinda want to blow through the next 10 to get the actual POINT! Do you sense I have a wee bit of impatience? I swear this is an actual gift in many circumstances.  

Anywho, with race recaps, I find myself reading faster or skipping over paragraphs to get to the punch line. "I don't care that you dropped a water bottle on the bike or had cramping at mile 38. HOW DID YOU ACTUALLY DO?!? 

So, let me tell you my result first and then I'll back track a little bit. 

I competed at High Cliff Triathlon just outside Appleton, Wisconsin, where I competed in the Aqua Bike Division. For those of you (like me), that thought this was like riding one of those pedal boats in the lake, it's not. It's just a regular triathlon, minus the run. I came in first overall with a final time of 2:50. Again, that means literally nothing to basically everyone, but it was a race from which I gained experience, and I was actually really freaking stoked with how the bike went for me! 

So rewind. Why that race? And why not just do the whole dang thing and run? Let me explain. Madison 70.3 on June 9th was my first choice, but with Sean graduating from residency that same weekend, this obviously couldn't even be up for consideration. As for the no running part, the run took place largely on wooded trails. Sounds absolutely stunning in theory, but with injury risk on the brain, I decided to eschew that portion of the race and focus on hammering the bike instead. 

Now that you know that, let's get real here for a second.

I wasn't super pumped about this race. You might be thinking, "Really? You train like you do and you don't want to actually show off all the work you put in?" Well let me reflect on that out loud for you. 

I had been in my groove with training, work was flowing well, Sean and just been on nights all week and agreed with me for just a moment that maybe not doing the race wasn't such a bad idea. And not only that, the idea of doing 2/3 of a triathlon didn't seem worth it. Looking back, I am obviously glad I did it. Doesn't that happen with EVERYTHING you didn't originally want to do in the moment? Except maybe drink too much or eat too much dessert...those definitely feel good in the moment. 

So the morning of the race I did everything I could to force myself into race mode. Basically, faking it all the way to making it. Shower, pre-race breakfast, coffee, music that scares babies...all while driving to the race start. After setting up my bike in transition, and grabbing my wet suit on my way down to the lake, I took a pit stop by the bathroom one last time. 

My period. Wonderful. I knewwwww I was pissed the night before for no reason. I didn't have anything with me, and no time to grab anything from anyone, so I guess I was just glad this race was partly in the water. 

The swim wasn't exciting. Except for the fact that the water was so shallow we had to walk 100 yards before we could actually dive in. I made a wrong turn at some point and had to ask a lady on a paddle board which way I was going...hormone brain is real people. 

Out of the water, out of the wet suit (I am always thankful when it slips off like a glove!) and on to my bike. My legs were screaming from the beginning. You know that terrible lactic acid feeling that feels like you lit your legs on fire? It stayed with me for 56 miles. Not only that, at about 800 meters in, my power meter dropped out so my plan of sticking to certain numbers was no longer. Oh my gossssh....what else? This is all I said to myself for the first 5 miles, until I just decided, "Get out of your head. One mile at a time. Keep drinking and eating and forcing a smile and you'll be done before you know it." 

And I was. I finished that sucker the best way I could. 

What did I learn?

• Always be prepared. Get yourself in the mindset to perform your best. Whether that's hydrating for a workout, memorizing that last slide of your presentation for work, or (as a woman) carrying period plugs with you AT ALL TIMES...failure to plan is planning to fail. 
• Stick it out. The tides can shift aggressively fast in either direction. In races it can happen in manners of seconds...It can do that in life too I suppose, but sometimes it feels like a personality disorder in triathlon. Like whoa, girl, you got this. Slow that crazy brain of your's. 

Thank goodness I have run out of words. Thanks for reading and for all the massive support. I feel it every single day.